Are you in a relationship that makes no sense? You may be in a karmic contract.

We may feel impelled to stay in a relationship we cannot understand. Our interactions with the other person keep us off balance, but saying goodbye feels difficult or impossible. For example, you can fall in love with someone who is not free to be yours. Or you may find yourself devoting great amounts of time and support to an individual you don't really love--or even like very much! Perhaps you are involved with someone who has psychological problems or is caught in a messy situation. Your life surely would be more peaceful without that person, but you can't bring yourself to leave.

How do you make sense of paradoxical relationships like these? Naturally you begin by examining your own feelings, motivations, and inner patterns, maybe with the help of a counselor. But if you still sense that a deep mystery is at work, you probably are right! You may be operating under a karmic contract. This is an agreement made between you and your soul to carry out certain actions or to have certain experiences in a relationship. It exerts a strong influence on whom you will draw into your life and how your interactions will unfold. Although you always have free will to leave a person, your soul's contract will encourage you to remain in that relationship until you have completed an inner task.

In this episode, Dr. Skafte explains how karmic contracts shape our feelings and actions. She recounts the astonishing story of Arthur, whose unhappy marriage led him to recognize a vow his soul had made "long ago and far away." Then his life changed forever.

Dr. Skafte will present you with three questions to help determine whether your relationship is operating under a karmic contract. She will offer suggestions on how to fulfill your soul-vows in ways that benefit your life and set you free.

About the author: Dianne Skafte holds a Ph.D. from the University of Colorado. She is a retired professor of depth psychology and is the author of numerous publications, including Listening to the Oracle: Receiving guidance from the signs and symbols all around us (Harper SanFrancisco, 1997.) Her work is devoted to exploring the spiritual dimensions of psychological life.